Le Dick – Polymath Comedy from Heyday Comedy Store

Lou Dick – The polymathic comedian learned his trade from the one and only Mitzi Shor.

Murray and Saul, two old Jewish men, are sitting on a park bench. Murray turns to Saul. “Saul.” “What’s going on, Murray?” “If you had $20 million, would you lend me $10?” “Of course I will lend you 10 million dollars. I don’t need 10 million dollars, let alone 20. I will give you 10 million dollars. Don’t ask a stupid question!”

A few minutes pass.

“Saul.” “What’s going on, Murray?” “If you have two office buildings, will you give me one?” “Of course I will give you an office building. I don’t need an office building, let alone two office buildings. Don’t ask a stupid question!”

A few minutes more.

“Saul.” “What’s going on, Murray?” “If you have two hours…”

“You bastard! You know I got two hours!”

Le Dick – Comedy Encyclopedia of Knowledge

If you had to choose between two doctors. One was a specialist who had been fully trained and certified as a general practitioner, in addition to learning and mastering his specialty. This is one doctor. The other doctor had basic training and certification as well, but was also a trained and certified specialist in dozens of medical fields. He would be your dentist, for example, but he was also an expert in hearing and blood pressure. I will choose the second man because anyone with a medical sense knows that the whole body is connected to itself. This is comedian Lou Dick. Really funny dentist. No, this is a joke. Lue Deck is a comedian who has done it all and done it excellently and has learned and worked with the best in the business. This is usually the expectation of a comedy encyclopedist.

Starting out as a Comedy Store janitor and MC, Dick cut his comedy teeth at the legendary club under the tutelage of the legendary one and only Mitzi Shor. There, he created The Comedy Channel, was an in-house improv director, active in The Comedy Store, a paid regular, a video executive and Mitzi’s personal assistant. As an act, it holds the world record for performing in 100 cities in one year, 10 years in a row! It’s open to everyone from Carrot Top to Dixie Chicks. He has performed extensively on USO tours in 17 countries, and over 100 cruise ship concerts. As a writer, Lue Deck is a CSPAN article winner. (appeared in 10 major newspapers across America), and was a featured stand-in on “I’m Dying Here!” by Bill Knodelseder, which was made into a very interesting Showtime series by executive producer Jim Carrey. His own book, “Decoding the Situation: Be as Funny as You Think You Are!” It is a popular e-book published by Xlibris.com. Like I said, Lou Dick – the world of comedy

Lou was also a dear friend of this comedian and writer. I thought it was time to shine a little light on him, as always, especially in ‘this town’, it’s hard to step out of the shadow of the latest giant comic monster casting a crushing shadow over us all. I met Lou while I was awaiting trial for attempted laziness.

H-Dog – Tell us about working for Mitzi.

deck – She knew the elements of a successful business. Take her advice or leave! By the time you can do what you want, you can sell your business. The work for her was relentless. From doorman to presenter to casting, the opportunities and responsibilities will pile up on you until you can’t handle it all. Video director to consultant to personal assistant. You gave her your ideas and followed her crazy orders. Looking back, she was right in 95% of her decisions. Not counting her choice of lovers!

h-dog: What was it like being the opening act for Ollie Joe Prater?

Deck: It was like driving a real life Wells Fargo wagon in Yosemite Sam! We did 87 cities the first year. He liked the single nitrates because they paid more. I have never seen any other work that was needed by all the guests in any given week! It was the most explosive, reliable and best-selling act we have ever seen.

h-dog: What was the Comedy Store like in its heyday?

Deck: It was impressive, like a Cape Canaveral comic strip every night, 3 or 4 stars destroying the crowds. Then, someone might be begging you for a drink coupon late on Tuesday. Robin (Williams, of course) knew I didn’t use Coke, so he kept his stash from me. Anything to suddenly become his friend. After I had an office, names were looking for me to hide there! Andy Kaufman, Richard Pryor, Rodney Dangerfield. I had to kick Sam Kinison out of the cell several times!

h-dog: I’ve done a lot of cruise ship gigs. Have you ever experienced any kind of quarantine situation like the one we are experiencing now?

Deck: It is common to miss a stop on a 3-stop tour due to dysentery. But, nothing like that! But cruise ships have always been petri dishes!

h-dog: Your radio show “Poor Lue’s Almanac!” It was nominated for a Peabody Award. Congratulations! Tell the Hollywood dog all about it.

Deck: Well, first of all, thank you. In 1997, I had a broken back and was just selling Jay Leno jokes. 1 of 60 sold, 2 of 40. I had 97 jokes with nothing to do so I copied Ben Franklin’s Poor Richard’s Almanac model. I used Publisher for digital transformation. Then, when I got better and went back to touring, I sold my calendar for $10 to radio DJs. Which led to an offer from Net Radio Live to do 25 episodes before broadcast. They nominated me, but I lost to Bernie Mac.

h-dog: Tell us about entertaining troops with the USO and the Department of Defense?

Deck: They were all foreign tours. I found my grandfather’s grave in an area about 20 miles northeast of Manila. This was a defining moment for me because I barely knew him.

h-dog: I understand you were the first comedian to perform in North Korea!

Deck: Same place as Trump and ON! And also in the building where the armistice was signed. The tour guide invited me to cross the 38^y In parallel, when I did this, the entire tour group shouted “BOO!” She jumped on the table, frightening the guards, making them all pull out their guns! I “surrendered”! Everyone laughs at my fun.

h-dog: Did you marry a policewoman? Did she have a sense of humor?

Deck: Her gun was bigger than mine! Google “cop and comedy!” Or search in my book or in my diary! The evidence won’t stand up in court!

h-dog: Were you also the first comedian to perform in Cuba?

Deck: ’93, my ship stopped to survey the port, and we went to the pier to exchange goods, food, and cigars, but did not disembark. At the door of the shipping warehouse, I made friends with customs and team members by making them laugh. I begged them to let me go to the end of the pier and touch the real Cuba, so the Cuban customs men allowed me to do so. I dashed off, told three jokes, and sauntered back, until the dogs ran to the dock and chased me into my ship. Applause from everyone except the dogs!

h-dog: Your bio says you invented the cruise ship toilet lizard. Care to explain?

Deck: It is an optical illusion using a suction toilet. I tell the audience after the show, to go to their room, get toilet paper, put a baseball sized ball on the toilet, flush 10-12 feet, and flush! The tail flush disappears into the toilet, and whoosh! Now imagine: the flaming lizard!

h-dog: I would, but I’m too busy crying about wasted toilet paper, especially these days! What position did David Letterman play on The Comedy Store basketball team? You were in the centre, weren’t you?

Deck: Starting position and Dave was outside forward. He wasn’t the best at rebounding, but his shooting was great. Jimmy Walker was good, so was John Witherspoon. We played at the Forum during the first half of the Lakers game.

h-dog: Who is the opposing team and did you win?

Deck: Pizza Hut and yes we won.

h-dog: Pizza Hut vs Comedy Store! This is hilarious. Go ahead. Have you performed in four states at the same time? How does this work?

Deck: I was offered to perform this gig in a private concert at the Four Corners landmark, the demarcation point where Arizona, Colorado, New Mexico and Utah meet. I thought it would be great to leave the stage and do five minutes of The Master.

h-dog: Well, my favorite fact about you is that you smoked weed on Bob Marley’s grave?

Deck: Yes, but buried 9 miles, up the mountain from Ocho Rios. They buried Bob in his front yard tilted up with a face shield, so you could see his face, and he could see the sun. He was transferred to Zimbabwe.

h-dog: Finally, I wanted to thank you for your time.

Deck: It’s been a pleasure!

h-dog: What does Mitzi Shor mean to you and comedy?

Deck: Mitzi deserves it as a leader in business, suffrage, and unique fame in a man’s world!

h-dog: Thanks again, Lou Dick. You are a great guy, comedian and friend. And I will definitely choose the doctor!

Deck: Be positive!

h-dog: I will do my best. (*returns mask)

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Lou Dick – Comedy World is the author of the definitive book on stand-up. Available online somewhere.

For The Hollywood Dog, that was the case Steven Alan Green.